Habits

So I have a bad habit. Wait, make that a few. When I meet someone for the first time my eyes remain firmly planted on the ground. As the evening progresses, my eye contact becomes a little more bolder ending in a full on stare. Not quite as scary as what it sounds like.

I met up with someone last night whom I deem a close friend and it was suprizing to me how much fun we had. Honestly can't say when last I had such a good time with someone. I feel out of place and akward in most social situations. The Dros in Midrand was playing a lot of familiar, but memorable songs. To get back to the evening though. I described it afterwards as "cementing our friendship" and he'll also be able to tell you it was way past long due. Time will tell what the future holds, but I really needed it last night. I'm currently re-evaluating a lot of things and people in my life, which also applies to those close to me. I tend to keep my mouth shut when I should be speaking my mind. Thoughts get stuck on the tip of my tongue. To me it is hurtful when I talk about things that matter in my life. I don't talk a lot, but when I choose to do so with even the simplest of topics, it matters to me. So many times I have listened for hours to others' problems, struggles, and fears. Yet the same consideration is seriously lacking with others. Yes, I am not as open as others, but I do allow you into the inner workings of my mind and life and that should mean something. Having me in your life should matter. Pay close attention to what I have to say.