NO means NO

I want to give voice to what I'm feeling. Jotting your thoughts down is supposed to be therapeutic, but sometimes I doubt that. I'm focusing on the construction of my sentences and the spelling rather than the content. It's never good enough and I'm trying to let the words flow and give meaning to what I'm feeling. For far too long I've been silencing what I'm feeling in the name of love and respect. Lowering and raising my standards at the same time and I really do not know how to change that at this stage. Have I ever really been happy at all? What is happiness?

The Slutwalk has been making the headlines in the news; a powerful feminist movement and protest against rape and sexual abuse. The clothing a woman chooses to adorn her body does not give any man the right to touch her without her consent and it is actually frightening to think how many men perceive certain outfits as provocation and invitation to do what they want.

NO means NO.

Would you like for me to repeat it in other languages?

minime
nei
nej
nee
cha
nein
illaï
Нет
não
ohi
non

Would it make any difference at all? The way gender is constructed in society does not allow for individuality and expression.

Fool

A seed is scooped up by the wind; light and carefree until that moment where the wind stops blowing or the seed hits something. Confused, it starts to look for a place to settle and start germinating and grow into something beautiful, but it is an unfamiliar, alien territory. I have also been that fool, trying to grow and lift my leaves up to the sun. The soil was toxic, however, and I still continue to let it poison my roots, because of guilt and what could be manipulation. I am moving past that terrible feeling of wanting revenge and redemption, but I still want that look of being left wanting more.

Joy and misery are two sides of a coin everyone wants regardless of what they might or might not say.