Never forgotten

I haven't thought about you in a while. Time does heal all wounds and my heart doesn't ache anymore. I miss you though. I miss the way you smelled when I hugged you close to me and your soft, sweet presence. The way you held my hand when we crossed the road. I was very selfish at that time, young and ignorant, and I cannot make up for the lost time. Somedays I get emotional when I think about you. I do not want to forget you. I hold onto the lingering memories of you and I'm not as sad as I used to be, but things will never be the same. I'll never be the girl I was before.

My last memories of you are of Orlando Bloom and Lord of the rings, pizza, Aero and the day at Bruma lake market where you bought me that armband and I can't believe that's all I can remember. Surely I can recall something of substance and meaning? I haven't forgotten how beautiful you were and how you touched the lives of others. I feel so incredibly alone most of the time. People come and go in my life and I let them. I feel like I am only existing, not really living. I feel like I stopped living when you passed away. Is there a trick or secret to being truly happy? I see so many happy faces around me and I am not. I wish you were here with me. Maybe I'd have a reason to smile. I miss you so much.